Managing thoughts and feelings can be viewed as the starting point of working through the challenges of conflict. I would contend that it is the groundwork for all other actions and approaches one may take to navigate conflictual situations. How can we share our honest views and reflections in a way that others can hear and how can we listen … Read More
Systemic Conflict Resolution in Families and the Workplace
All conflict arises in a system or systems. The focus of this article is to investigate this statement and the application of conflict resolution practices in light of it. It follows on from the previous article on the meaning of “conflict”. I mediate conflicts on a weekly basis where the participants are two colleagues or two family members. I regularly … Read More
A meaning of and a necessity for conflict
The word “conflict” can throw up many different associations. We will all have had experience of conflict at some stage of our life, at some level, in some way. Perhaps we could say that each of us is likely to have a relationship with conflict. As you bring it to mind now, notice the thoughts, feelings or images that arise. … Read More
Zooming in and out of Conflict
I really enjoy sitting down to write and reflect on relationship, difference, conflict, and the navigation of these sometimes challenging river systems. However, I can get pulled into the day-to-day administration tasks of running and developing a business. Then I can lose touch with the passion I have for understanding the nature of conflict and the maps we need to … Read More
Facilitating and modulating expression in conflict
What does “facilitating expression” look like in practice? In the last article, “The under-expressed and the over-expressed in conflict”, I referred to an aspect of the mediator role as one who facilitates and modulates expression. I also said I would say more about what this might look like in practice. Therefore, this article will be a short(ish!) and sharp list … Read More
The under-expressed and the over-expressed in conflict
What do we mean by “conflict”? What do we mean by “peace”? What do we mean by “conflict resolution”? What do we mean by “conflict transformation”? This article aims to encourage and support continuing reflection on the work that we are engaged in as mediators. This process of reflection can be a pillar in helping us develop our practice and … Read More
Untangling Toxic Conflict
When differences turn into toxic conflict[1] it usually takes a toll on all involved. As someone who supports people through conflict, increasingly I see my job as helping people live a life they can be happier in. That may look different to each one of the people I work with, it could constitute feeling more settled, peaceful, connected, energised, more … Read More
Anxiety when in conflict – managing and moving through
This is an article I wrote through the lens of my work as a psychotherapist. However, it also struck me how frequently anxiety arises when we’re in conflict. Anxiety is so fundamentally linked to issues of safety, or to be more specific, the challenge to our feelings of safety in the world, that it seems to me it is inevitable … Read More
Questions, questions, questions
Have you ever worked in a job where you make an agreement with a colleague or a client, agree some actions perhaps, then meet again a few weeks later only to find nothing has moved forward? Have you ever listened to a friend who is going through a challenging time, offered some impartial third-party advice to help them get to … Read More
Anger FORBIDDEN, the impact on conflict and mediation
Anger. Feeling anger. Feeling angry. Being angry. Fury. Feeling fury. Feeling furious. Rage. I was struggling to find a way to ease into an article on anger, possibly because one doesn’t tend to ease into the feeling of being angry, well not in my experience anyway. I know it as a sharper more pointed personal response and reaction to precipitating … Read More
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